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Old Mud
Joined: 03 May 2007
Posts: 1048
Location: Bath, Maine
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 Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2007 10:15 am Post subject: BECAUSE !!! |
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Because !!!
Why...
do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "Lisp"?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And my FAVORITE......
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.
_________________
"I was so poor growing up that if I wasn't a BOY I'd have had nothing to play with"
All that truly matters in the end is that you LOVED !!!! |
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cmorjoe
Joined: 03 May 2007
Posts: 256
Location: Seymour CT.
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| Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2007 4:31 am Post subject: Ain't it the truth! |
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| All funny Old Mud; too bad it seems the other folks on this site don't seem to read the jokes: or maybe they just don't respond. Keep them coming they brighten up MY day. cmorjoe |
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clumberhunter
Joined: 09 May 2007
Posts: 32
Location: New London
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| Posted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 6:55 pm Post subject: |
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Old Mud, I love all the jokes keep them coming.
Matt
_________________
Consulting: If you're not part of the solution, there is a lot of money to be made prolonging the problem. |
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Just4fun
Joined: 08 May 2007
Posts: 1389
Location: Saybrook
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| Posted: Fri Sep 28, 2007 9:58 am Post subject: |
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Those are good,..I chuckled out loud at a few of them!
_________________
"If people concentrated more on the really important things in life there'd be a shortage of fishing poles."
Mark |
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