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Old Mud



Joined: 03 May 2007
Posts: 1048
Location: Bath, Maine

PostPosted: Wed Feb 11, 2009 9:37 am    Post subject: Maintain your sanity !!! Reply with quote

To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice !

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks .. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Es presso.

5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Marijuana.

6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.

7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

9. Sing Along At The Opera.

10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.

11. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

13 . Tell Your Children Over Dinner , 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'



And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity



14. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK W H ERE THE FITTING ROOM IS. Rolling Eyes Laughing Laughing Laughing




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"I was so poor growing up that if I wasn't a BOY I'd have had nothing to play with"




All that truly matters in the end is that you LOVED !!!!
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BoSox46GSR



Joined: 29 Mar 2009
Posts: 388
Location: Chester

PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 9:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Those are pretty damn good. I'll have to give em a shot.
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